Monkey Butt

Honey! You said you would pick up that piece of bread under the chair!

THE BURD IS BACK!

Picture time!!!

The Burd is back!!!!

You got it right!!! The word is out and the word is the Burd. To hell with the man! The Burd shall once again exercise the right to free speech. The crew be hangin and with a little support from my team we shall once again drop some tidbits of wisdom. Ally girl be looking like Beetle Juice and Sabe be teamin up with Jonny D spewing that left wing tree hugging granola eating rhetoric!!!  But now i shall impart some knowledge.
The Burd was chillin at the club when sure enough some limp dick fool rolled up with a nice little package of Burd treats. The Burd strolled on over and told the boy to take his treat on home and go ahead warm up the oven. You see the Burd was gonna head on over and drop a loaf of custom made french bread in that oven and trust me its best to preheat the oven. Aint nothing better than watching your loaf rise ladies. You will learn to appreciate it. Trust Me!! 
Jonny D - Pussy pop on a hand stand!!
Im going to redo my hair before the interview - thats from a dude and i dont think he is gay?
Strong A - None of my booty calls are answering!!!
Just a little rant and rave kiddos!!
Just wait till we get to the Rooster!!!

No mas Pollito!!!!!!!!!!!!

Minions be aware!! We have unleashed upon the unsuspecting populace a terrible scourge known as Ryan (AKA Pollito). One of our own has flown the coup. Good luck little canary! Unfortunately the subtle slights and witticisms shall be less abundant. As much as it pains the Burd to say it I hate to see you go. Now fuck off!!! Quote of the day:
"Bro i have hit hotter red heads than that. Of course that's when i had hair........and money."
Stay tuned little kiddies there is more to come!!!

The man has yet to build a cage that can hold the burd!!!!!!!

It is true my loyal followers, big brother put the Burd in a cage!!!  But alas we have spread our wings and once again we shall delight you with a few humorous qoutes.
"I feel good for being retarded"
"I'm goin with that one. Rhinoplasty is a hell of a lot cheaper than a boob job!"
"Do you think Bob is jealous of Dave's vibrant homosexual youth?"
In all honesty kiddos the man got the burd. Apperently the Burd participated in the involantary blood drive down at the Bexar County Detention Center. If you think it might look good on your resume, dont bet on it!!
Aint nothing better than a breath of free air!!!!!!!

Ah - Damn!!

A little tidbit for my my boy!

"She's next, after i break up with her."
"Who was that guy you were T-baggin last night? Dude that was you!"

Trust me I have more. I misplaced my journal!!  It's not a diary!!